Ode to Florida

When we got orders to Florida I was devastated. It was no where on our list and I really knew nothing about it. I had a picture in my head of bright colors, the spring-break party scene and alligators. I got over the initial shock of not getting a location we wanted and decided God must have a purpose in this move and so we chose to make the best of a new adventure. We were so happy to be getting out of the boat life and long deployments and into the aviation world with the Coast Guard. 

Tampa Bay quickly charmed us with its white-sand beaches, killer sunsets and gorgeous greenery. We were surprised by how many hidden gems we found near us and how much we liked the area, despite the horribly humid summer. We met some incredible people, got plugged into a wonderful church and God opened our heart wide to foster care and adoption. We got pregnant with Eleanor and began fostering babies in the same year, a wild journey of trust and surrender. We strapped our babes on for lots of exploring and bucket list items- memories I will treasure forever. The variety of plants and wildlife is impressive here and it stays green most of the year! We found our favorite spots, coffee shops of course, and views of the water, trails, parks galore and magical springs to kayak through. Those parts were easy to love- others not so much. You can get eaten alive by mosquitos and no-see-ums in 1 minute flat! And the summer/Fall is unbearably hot and sweaty- you need at least two showers a day or to own a pool. The drivers are absolutely terrible and traffic is too, not to mention the stoplights are the longest you’ll ever meet. Florida is full of quirky everything, but you could argue that is what makes it fun and charming in its own weird way. We live in a busy, fast paced area with pockets of wonderful and then pockets of not-so-wonderful. But isn’t that how life is? We’ve learned our attitude is everything moving to a new place- you hunt for the good and make it feel like home. You find your people and your places and before you know it, you are sad thinking about leaving somewhere you once thought you could never-ever live! I laugh that we have been here 6 years, the one station we thought we wanted to avoid has been our home for more than half of Sam’s career. 

Florida hasn’t been easy, it hands down brought me the most joy and pain combined! We didn’t want to get an extension here, after Jordan died we wanted to leave as fast as possible. I thought there was no way I could stay any longer, living with daily triggers and facing all the places that brought me such sorrow. But God knew we needed to finish this chapter, more healed and whole. One street over from where Jordan died, is the street my daughter was born on, which is also along the same main road that leads to our church. The juxtaposition of pain and joy was ever-constant. He wasn’t going to allow us to leave bitter and angry- remembering Florida only for what was stolen from us, because it has been so much more than that. Florida marked us and changed us forever- we endured a truly horrific tragedy and also saw amazing victories. We learned how to process pain and grief here, how to receive from people and admit when we need help, we learned new depths of the love and forgiveness of the Lord. Weaved into the pain was great love and miracles upon miracles. 

I will never forget Florida- where I had my 3 babies and fell in love with a God who carried me close and touched every broken place with His goodness. Florida, where we found the richest community that held us up, friends that are now family forever. Florida brought me to the end of myself and to more of God- into a story I could never- ever have written, but feel so humbled to be a part of. It is truly bittersweet to leave this place. But I know it’s time now, I can recognize that and know that there is so much good ahead. A fresh start and a continuation of our journey. I’m just so very thankful He didn’t let us leave early like we thought we wanted.